Thursday, March 16, 2006

Dut dut da DAAAAH! Introducing Sir Robert Poopsalot (A.K.A. Kyle)

My first full day as a mommy was...well...interesting. Considering I had NO sleep last night. Kyle sleeps so peacefully during the day for some nice durations of time, but at night, the gremlin in him comes out and he wakes up every HALF HOUR!

This morning I had to take him to the pediatrician for his 48 hour check-up that is mandated by the State for adopted kids. I'm used to waking up, eating, dressing, feeding animals and dashing out the door in 30 minutes or less. This morning it took an hour and a half to get myself ready and Kyle.

Some friends gave us an old stroller. It weights about 418 pounds. I decided to toss it in the back of the VUE in case I needed it. The car was in the garage. There is not enough room to carry a baby in a car seat through the garage, let alone open the back seat door of the car. I put Kyle in the car seat, left him near the front door and backed the car out. Next, I put the stroller behind the car and grabbed Kyle. Being my first time putting the car seat in the base, it took me a while to figure it out. The directions said it was supposed to just "snap securely in place" HA! After wrestling with a car seat that has an attitude worse than a constipated crocodile, I wearily climbed behind the wheel and slammed the stick into reverse. The wheels rolled back a few feet when it dawned on me... THE STROLLER!!!! Slamming my right foot on the brake, I punched the lock and flew out the door. The back tires of the VUE were only inches away from the beastly stroller. Grunting, I lifted the thing and struggled to put it in the back of the VUE.

The doctor visit went well. Kyle is extremely healthy and his poop is normal (he showed off the prowess of his active bowels for the doc as the diaper came off). Dr. Kesselman asked if I had any questions. I was ready for him. "How do you know what cries to ignore, and what cries to attend to?" I leaned forward to the doc as he rocked from side to side on his rolly-stool.

"Let Kyle teach you that."

Just what I needed to hear. I was hoping he'd offer me some miraculous wisdom that would afford both John and I some sleep tonight. Most questions were answered "the baby will teach you." My assignment before the 2 week visit, is to know some things Kyle likes and dislikes. He loves to poop. He hates getting his diaper changed.

Of course doctors like to look over entire babies so they are undressed. When the time came to re-dress my little garden gnome (he does look like the Roaming Gnome sans beard), I noticed he had spit up all over his sleepy thingy. BUT I was prepared! I had an EXTRA sleepy thingy with feeties for such a time as this. I slid the onepiece outfit under my child's back, grabbing flailing arms and legs to stick in the right holes. Then the snaps. Not everyone has fingers as small as Barbie! I have big fingers thanks to my dad, and struggled to snap Kyle up. Something didn't look right.

"Uh, Doc, does this look backwards to you?" I asked, noticing the weird twist of the feet.

"Let me see, " he said coming over to straighten the legs, "yep, it's on backwards - hey Wanda, come meet this new mommy, she put her babies onsie on backwards!"

Color rushed into my cheeks as I grumbled about "aren't the snaps supposed to be in the front? I thought the snaps were supposed to be in the front for easy access..." Laughter was the constant background noise as I finally flipped the child over and then looked cluelessly at him. Finally, the nurse, Wanda helped me figure out how to put an outfit that in my opinion, was made BACKWARDS onto the screaming, raisin-faced infant.

Sheesh. I really need sleep.

1 comment:

Karen T said...

I just read through the happy saga and am reminded of about two years ago with two of them - only they were a bit smaller and my fingers felt really big and clumsy. I also have to admit that Peter hated the outfits as well. Once I got him trained on the onesies that button up the front I had to get rid of all the ones that button in the back - it just made it simpler for Peter not to have to try and figure out which way it buttoned. Though I thought the direction of the feet would have helped... Wait till you find out what it's like to hear a child laugh or giggle for the first time...